When you’re exploring different college options, one main consideration you make is if you can get into the schools you’re applying for. It’s easy to forget that there is a second challenge: keeping up with your coursework once you are attending the school.

Two Challenges

Everyone probably wishes they could get into Ivy League schools like Harvard or Princeton. After all, they are incredibly prestigious, and degrees from those institutions would surely help you stand out in the working world. While it’s easy to daydream of getting into a very tough school, it’s also important to think about how you would perform once you are attending. It’s vital to remember that the more selective a school you attend, the more rigorous the academics will be, as they expect a lot from their students. The workload is much more challenging than at a less-selective school, so the hard part doesn’t always end once you receive your acceptance letter. The work will continue once you are there.

If you get into a school that you thought may be out of your reach, you need to do some self-assessment and decide if you are up to the challenge for four years of rigorous coursework that may or may not be at your level. Do you want to go somewhere where you will need to spend the majority of time studying, or would you rather go somewhere with less emphasis on academics? How strong of a student are you? How important are extracurricular activities to you? Will you be disappointed if you don’t have enough time to play sports or join clubs?

My Story

I was never a bad student, but I was never a perfect one, either. I got a fair mix of A’s and B’s in high school. However, I was extremely active in extracurricular activities; I was the vice president of orchestra, I was in a wonderful community service group, I ran track, I helped start an independent newspaper. I was creative and took all honors and AP classes, so I thought I would do well at Brown, an Ivy League school in Rhode Island that is known to have many smart but laid-back, artistic types. Despite its relaxed image, it is still a very tough school to get into.

I applied to Brown and I was asked to interview with a local alum. The interview went well, and my interviewee told me that if anyone got into Brown from my high school, she thought it would be me. Unfortunately, nobody from my high school was accepted – they just weren’t looking for our demographic that year.

At first I was devastated. I thought I would fit in so well there. But my mother said something that really made me think. She reminded me that if I had gotten into Brown, it would have been a constant struggle to stay on top of the academics. It is an Ivy League school and the course work is demanding. Because I was never a stellar student, if I were to go there, I would most likely have to work extra hard to do well and pass my classes.

While it was a slight blow to my ego, I realized she was right. I would probably have to work so hard to stay afloat that I wouldn’t get to enjoy other aspects of college as much. I began to understand that I needed to find a school that was still well respected but wasn’t as academically rigorous. I did find a school that was perfect for me – the University of Texas, which is becoming more prestigious each year. Most of the classes were challenging and stimulating enough for my intellectual needs, but it was on par with my academic abilities, so I was able to keep up and maintain a good GPA. I still had enough time to enjoy other activities and wasn’t always stressed about academics like I would have been had I gone to a much more challenging school.

If You Get In, Give it a Shot

Let’s say that your dream is to go to Stanford, but you’re not sure if you’re Ivy League material. Here’s a good planning strategy: Apply to a few schools you’re sure you can get into – perhaps University of California at Irvine or Santa Barbara. Then apply to a few that you are likely to get into – perhaps Berkeley or University of Southern California. Then, apply to Stanford in case you do get in. If you don’t, you will still have other great schools to fall back on.

Now let’s say you are accepted to Stanford, but you’re concerned it will be too challenging. First, don’t decline the offer if you think it is something you will regret. Why? Because you can always transfer to another school if you aren’t happy there. If you made it into a school as well respected as Stanford, many other colleges will be happy to have you. So, if you do get into that stretch school and it’s your dream to go there, go there and give it your very best shot. You might surprise yourself and flourish there.

But if you realize that it is too much work to stay afloat, you can consider transferring to a school that still has a great reputation, but will not cause as much stress and will give you more time to pursue interests outside of academics. Sometimes it takes time to find a school that meets all your needs, and there is nothing wrong with that.

I know, I know…you cannot wait to get away from your family and be independent. It’s every high school senior’s dream to finally escape curfews, rules, and snooping parents. But before you head off to a faraway place for college in order to flee what’s familiar, you should consider what it will be like to be so far away from your family and if that is the right decision for you.

If you go to a school across the country, remember that it will take a major road trip or an expensive plane ride every time you want to go home. Depending on your economic situation, it may limit you to visiting home only a few times a year. After spending 18 years with these people, do you think you can handle seeing them only on major holidays?

There is no wrong answer; this is just something to take into consideration. Some people may be very ready for it, while others can’t bear that thought. Not everyone is close to their family. However, even if you don’t feel particularly close to your family, you may not realize how much you will miss them until you are 700 miles away and just want a taste of your mom’s casserole.

If you’re the type of person who can go away to camp all summer and barely miss home, going to college far away may be easy for you. But if you’re the type of person who doesn’t like leaving home or gets homesick, you may be happier going to college at a place where home is not so far away.

It’s possible to find a happy medium between feeling like you’re escaping your family but still close enough that you can go home easily if you need to. I almost went to school across the country, but I was never the type who liked being away from home for long and I realized it would be very hard for me. I ended up going to school about 160 miles from home. That was the perfect distance for me because I was far enough away from home that I didn’t feel like my parents would just drop by and surprise me. However, the car ride home, which took around three hours, was pretty painless and allowed me to spend time with my family whenever I wanted. Some weekends I just wanted a break from college life, needed a home-cooked meal and a free place to do my laundry, and coming home that short distance was easy.

While that was the right decision for me, I had many friends who went to school far away and loved it. They reveled in the freedom and were just fine with the distance, and really didn’t mind the occasional plane ride. For many people, this independence is what they need. If you feel that you need independence but are being pressured to stay close to home, think about what’s right for you. If your instinct tells you that you need a totally new experience far from home, don’t go to college 30 miles from where you grew up.

Then again, staying in your hometown may be right for you. If you are extremely close to your family, or even if you have a family member who is sick and you don’t want to leave them, there is nothing wrong with not leaving your city to attend college.

When you’re thinking about where you want to get your higher education, be sure to consider how close you are to your family and how important it is for you to be near them (or away from them). Remember, if you go somewhere far away and realize it’s not for you, you can always transfer somewhere closer.

Alternatively, if you’re ready for college but not quite ready for the leap of going somewhere far off, start at a school near or in your hometown but live in a dorm or your own apartment. That way you are near your family but still experiencing independence. If after one semester or year you find that you want more room to grow on your own, you can then transfer to a school further away.

A new online resource has recently been launched by the government to encourage high school students to go to college and to help them figure out how to get there. It also helps their parents learn how to be supportive partners throughout the process.

College.gov, the new website, was implemented by the United States Department of Education. It was designed by students, however, so it is colorful and hip – not like most other government-backed websites! The site features several videos and written testimonials of students who overcame hurdles such as peer pressure, lack of funding, or an supportive family and still made it to college.  

The site is divided into two main sections.  The first section is for the high school student and the second one is for the student’s parents and family. The section for students is grouped into several subcategories. One, called “why go,” tells students all the various ways college can improve their lives. The reasons include boosting future earning potential, finding your passion, and creating a legacy of success in your family. Pretty compelling reasons, I’d say!

The next section, “what to do,” is excellent for students who know they are interested in college but don’t know how to get started. This section teaches you the difference between 4-year and vocational schools, explains the importance of entrance exams, provides tips on applying to schools, and helps you creative a personalized, interactive roadmap to college based on your high school grade level.

It’s no secret that college prices are rising, and the hefty price tag may cause many potential college students to think a higher education is out of reach. Not so! The third section, “how to pay,” explains all your payment options for school. These include government aid, scholarships, private loans, grants, work-study programs, and more. The section also provides money management tips and advice on avoiding financial scams in the application process.

Are you motivated to go to college but just can’t get your family to approve or help you? College.gov’s section for parents and family of the student is there to help get them on your side. This section explains why helping your child go to college is a gift that will help give them a better life. It explains how parents can help their children in the application process and how to deal with the cost of college expenses.

I love that the government has stepped in to create this resource. Now that the doors of college are open to more students than ever, those who choose not to go will be left behind. They will have less career opportunities and earning potential. I think it is wonderful that the government has made a student-friendly online resource, especially with all the testimonials from real students who overcame hardship and made it to college. It’s also great that the website includes a section for parents, because even if the student is desperate to go to college, an uncooperative parent can put those plans to a stop. Kudos to the Department of Education for putting together this new resource to show students that going to college doesn’t have to just be a dream!